“The year 2014 was amazing in terms of a dialogue regarding women’s rights, feminism, and a growing awareness of the struggles that every self-identified woman faces on a daily basis. Popular culture has afforded different icons and voices for human rights, coming from different backgrounds and experiences. This week’s theme for www.kickaction.ca’s carnivale is Role Models and Leadership – and many have looked to celebrity feminist icons for inspiration and guidance on what leading a feminist life looks like.

This is wonderful – but as a community development specialist, and I like to see things in a small-scale, community based spectrum. How many of us have stopped to consider how our parents, brothers and sisters, extended family members, educators, etc have shaped our vision of women’s rights and abilities? It is absolutely fantastic to look to women such as Emma Watson, Maggie Gyllenhaal, Beyonce as symbols of women’s voice – but what about those closer to us that inspire and teach us about what can be possible? I thankfully grew up among many strong women and men who created a safe space for me to explore my ideas and try them out. I am now an independent woman who has no qualms with speaking her mind (no, but really. Just ask anyone who works with me.), while actively listening to other points of view.

There have been so many, many people in my life who I can credit with guiding me, supporting me, and shaping my feminist ideals and desire for human equality. Almost as many have shown me that it is possible to be an empowered career and family minded woman – something that becomes increasingly important to me as I find myself thinking about settling in one country or city for more than a year or two (something that has not been a reality since I was 17). I am aware of the privilege I have that I can move around and work and study wherever the wind takes me – but I am also increasingly aware of how difficult aligning my wanderlust, career goals, and family goals is. When I find women who are able to achieve these things, I am truly inspired and do what I can to stay in touch and try to absorb their amazingness.

It’s actually difficult to decide who to write about today, as I begin to think about it – there are many amazing people who have achieved just these things. I want to share a story about a grad school professor that I have lost contact with, but still remember the impact she had on me and our class. I took a course for maybe two months about development projects in Africa – it appealed to me on so many levels. As we were in the first class being introduced to our professor, something of a rockstar for the entire school, I remember that almost every woman in my class had our jaws almost to the floor. She stood up at the front ticking off her academic accomplishments and her professional accomplishments (which include working for The Economist, and basically helping to develop our entire graduate program), and then as if an afterthought, she mentioned that she was married and had four or five kids (I don’t fully remember the number). From then on she was rockstar number one for me and many of my colleagues – she was proof it was possible. She was/is also an excellent professor, but that’s not what stays with me to this day. It’s that she has a family.

I could rant about the unfairness of a heteronormative, patriarchal society that has shaped me to be truly inspired by a woman who has had a successful career and family – but I won’t. It’s old news (read: anciently old) and something we are all fully aware of if not personally touched by. I choose to focus on the optimism that this ideological structure may change and the hope that into the future, someone (particularly a woman) who is able to achieve career and family goals won’t be such a huge inspiration – because that will be the norm. “